OA Book Club: Review of "Working With You Is Killing Me"

No matter how much you love your job, you've probably - at some point - worked with (or for) someone who made your blood boil. Believe me, I know. I've been there. So, when I picked up Working With You Is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work by Katherine Crowley and Kathi Elster, I had some high expectations. After all, I know how impossible it can be to deal with a difficult boss or coworker, so the promise of learning how to handle these people was definitely intriguing.

I'm pleased to report that I was not disappointed. This isn't just a tepid, "let's all get along" kind of book. It actually functions as more of a roadmap, guiding you through the often rocky terrain of the workplace. While the book offers no "one size fits all" solution, it does provide a step-by-step process (referred to as "unhooking") that, for all intents and purposes, is like a magic formula for breaking the vicious emotional cycles that can easily occur when interactions in the workplace become tense.

According to Crowley and Elster, dealing with difficult people is all about taking control of your response, and the unhooking process provides four steps for doing so:

1. Unhook physically

2. Unhook mentally

3. Unhook verbally

4. Unhook with a business tool

Each step is clearly outlined and defined early in the book. Once you've got the strategy down, you're then lead through a series of common workplace scenarios (short stories are used to illustrate various topics) and the four-step unhooking process is applied to demonstrate how one would successfully manage each.

The book covers a lot of ground and, surprisingly, seems to hit upon every annoying coworker/boss issue and personality trait known to man (including those obscure ones that you thought were unique to your workplace). Reading the descriptions of familiar workplace foes will, undoubtedly, cause you to immediately begin identifying who's who in your office. And perhaps, you'll begin to see yourself in a new light as well...

As a writer, I'm especially drawn to books that are clearly organized and succinct. Working With You Is Killing Me is a perfect example of what I like to read. It's intelligent and surprising, but completely straight-forward. It's full of checklists and bullet point summaries, which makes it especially handy for future reference. The strategies provided are tangible and down-to-earth (no abstract, wishy-washy suggestions here). It even provides a few self-assessment quizzes for those of us who need a little help figuring out exactly what's going on and our role in the situation.

Overall, I'm a fan of Katherine Crowley and Kathi Elster. But then, that statement shouldn't surprise anyone. It's the reason I invited them to become contributing writers for OA premium members. So, for those of you who enjoyed Working With You Is Killing Me, I highly encourage you to investigate the Silver membership package. You'll get a lot more from Katherine and Kathi (along with several other well-known authors). And, if you haven't picked up this book yet, there's no time like the present. Trust me: Workplace issues will be a thing of the past once you learn how to manage your response. It's not difficult, but you need these strategies to really take control, once and for all.

Be sure to keep your eye out for the upcoming podcast featuring Katherine Crowley and Kathi Elster providing advice for YOUR workplace relationship problems.

Next Month's Selection:

It took me a while to choose the next book for our group. I really wanted to read something about creativity in the workplace because I think many of us enjoy creative thinking but don't know how to bring it into our work. Thinkertoys: A Handbook of Creative-Thinking Techniques appears to be a perfect fit! The product description on Amazon says, "THINKERTOYS will teach you how to generate new ideas for businesses, markets, sales techniques, and products and product extensions. Packed with fun and practical tools and exercises, it outlines 30 practical linear and intuitive techniques that can be used by individuals or groups to tackle and solve business problems in fresh, creative ways." It boasts more than 30 brainstorming techniques and hundreds of creative-thinking tips and tricks.

and head over to the OA Book Club group to discuss!